If you have arrived here with trauma that has held you back for way too many years, if you've arrived here with a calling on your heart, yet you've been unable to live it because your inner voice tells you that you can't and the world and the church agree. If you feel that you are broken, too much, or not enough, I'm here to tell you right now that your life can look very, very different. I've walked many women down the pathway to real freedom.

Welcome home, buckle up, and we're going to have a conversation. I'm going to talk to you directly right now because you are enough, you can be all of yourself, and your trauma no longer has to hold you back. 

10 signs that you are not over your past

1. Memories that are still painful

You think about them often, and you're haunted by them. Sometimes there are flashbacks; those memories can take over your day, take over your life; they bring thoughts of not being enough, of shame, etc. If you still have those memories and they're still painful, you are not over your past.

2. Triggered by people and places that remind you of it

If you are triggered by people or places that remind you of something that has happened in your past. You know, you see or smell something familiar, from abuse to trauma, and immediately your heart starts to race. Maybe you're hypervigilant and have emotional flashbacks.

3. Internal critic

That voice that constantly tells you how bad you are, it points out every mistake, no matter how small; it tells you that you're not good enough and that you're flawed. That inner bully does not take time off and is always there to steal your joy. Even when you're successful, it tells you that somehow it was a fluke.

4. Protective

You're wary of everything and everyone; you just have a hard time trusting people. That is a result of having pain in your past; you reject before you're rejected, and you always feel that you need to be watching to see what is coming from which direction.

5. Younger part of you running your life

When we're triggered, we feel not our adult selves, but we feel younger; we feel like we did when we were trapped, helpless, hopeless, fearful, or scared and abused. We get stuck in repeating trauma loops; we keep thinking about it. Sometimes we have really immature responses to current stresses, and it doesn't even feel like who we are, and that's because there's a younger part of us that's still wounded and still trying to figure out how to cope and how to survive.

6. Poor self-care

That usually comes from feeling unworthy of good things, like, "I shouldn't have this, I shouldn't spend money on myself." I'm not able to say what I need or what I feel. I put myself last, as I did when I was in abuse.

7. Constant fight or flight

This is a perpetual state of arousal. I feel unsafe; I have body feelings. I can go into panic attacks.

8. Hypervigilant and anxious

Always watching for what's coming next. That other shoe is going to drop. I just know it. I can have really generalized fears. What started out as a fear of one thing has now become a fear of many things, or everything, and again, I can have panic attacks.

9. Depression

Depression is hopelessness, helplessness, and anger turned inward. It's something that doesn't happen overnight. It comes on. It is something that I've had for a while that continues to build, and then I end up in a depression where I don't see a way out and I don't see that things are going to get better.

10. Relationship issues

I watch and expect rejection. I feel unsafe, I go through serial relationships with people who abuse me, don't really see me, don't love me, or don't care for me. I also can feel like I don't quite fit in those of us who have been through abuse we don't quite fit in, because other people wouldn't understand if we told them what we had been through and what it had done to us.

So while that was a great list, right? So if you've been through trauma and abuse, is this how it's always going to be? Yes, and no. Yes, if you don't address this trauma because you figured out how to survive in it, then this is your life and will always be. But no, it isn't always going to be this way. If you are proactive and determined that you will no longer live life as a victim. Instead, you make the decision that you will do everything that it takes to finally be healed and free, and you will no longer be held back from the life Christ died to give you.

I know this is going to sound weird, but healing is actually the easy part. One weekend is all it takes to transform from feeling broken, in pain over past memories, and unhappy with who you are. And to release all of that and be set free. I know, because I've done it hundreds and hundreds of times, that every person that I have worked with in a Weekend Intensive has been healed during that weekend. It truly is the easy part.

And I know you've been told that those that have been through trauma will always be traumatized, that there is no healing for it, that all we can hope for is a better limp through life, learning skills that handle life better, and that you're never really going to be healed. And I'm here to tell you, that just is not true. Healing is quick, what takes a bit longer is rebuilding you into the amazing, incredible, God designed person He always meant you to be.

Discover how you can heal your trauma and abuse memories in just one weekend. Book a consultation or email me at [email protected].

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